Opining Remarks
opinion n. 1. A belief held often without positive knowledge or proof.
Often. Not sometimes or occasionally, but often. So according to my American Heritage Dictionary, technically speaking, most opinions are just individually conjured whimsy. Maybe I’m completely naive, but reading this was like learning that there isn’t actually gold in Fort Knox that was backing up the cash in my wallet (all six buck of it). It is just paper that has value because we collectively decide to believe that it does.
I always liked the phrase, "Opinions are like assholes, everybody has one,” but it only struck me as an indictment of the sheer number, not the quality. If a person has inherent value, I thought, so must their opinions. I’m beginning to think I was wrong on both counts.
I suppose it is also the indirect result of our social structure. In our relentless and utterly futile pursuit of individuality, we’re made to feel as if we should have an opinion on matters of all sorts, regardless of our interest, knowledge or experience with that particular topic.
“What’s your opinion? Certainly, you must have some opinion on this most important of issues? ”
From Supreme Court nominees to the best pizza in town (Pepper’s, by the way), it seems to have become our duty as Americans to have an opinion. With everybody expecting us to have them and asking us about them, it’s only natural that we would eventually begin considering them vitally important.
Over the course of time, people have added weight to the general idea of opinion by referring to their own with misleading statements such as “I think…,” “The way I understand it is..” and “My theory is …” when in fact there is very little thinking, understanding or theorizing going on.
Maybe I’m making too much of this. Maybe it is simply a matter of semantics. Maybe if the same word didn’t describe both what I seek from a thoroughly trained, board-licensed physician (or a second one if the first one’s is chlamydia) and every piece of intellectually dishonest, out-of-context bullshit that spills out of Rush Limbaugh’s fat head every day, then it might not bother me so much.
So that’s it then. I need a new phrase that both accurately describe the assertion of beliefs without positive knowledge or proof and warns any unsuspecting readers, listeners or innocent bystanders of the composition of what’s coming their way. “Throwing Poo” is the best thing I have come up with. Besides, who doesn't like a good fart joke?
That said, here’s the windup and the pitch…
Comments
"If a person has inherent value, I thought, so must their opinions."
Yes, yes, yes.
In my opinion, anyway.
Posted by: buckkel | April 10, 2006 08:51 AM