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FrivoList: Painfully Accurate Re-Branding Suggestions for the Quality Inn Hotel I Stayed In Last Night Near The Missouri State Line

 

NEW NAME: Depravity Inn
NEW TAGLINE: Our staff of sunken-eyed crackwhores will attend to your every need...usually for about $5.

NEW NAME: Agony Inn
NEW TAGLINE: Now offering the flattest pillows imaginable!
 
NEW NAME: "Quality" Inn
NEW TAGLINE: If you're one of those literal dipshits who thinks that because the word "quality" is in our name you will actually receive a high standard of convenience and comfort, well, have we got a smelly room for you!

NEW NAME: Felony Inn
NEW TAGLINE: Present your fresh stitches at check-in and receive 10% off one night's stay!

NEW NAME: Malady Inn
NEW TAGLINE: Grab a complimentary wet doorknob on the way in and then enjoy a private game of barefoot hopscotch through the heavily stained carpeting in your room.

NEW NAME: Quality Inn Cognito
NEW TAGLINE: If you are looking for quality, you're gonna have to look pretty damn hard.

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Comments

It's a shame most folks don't carry around a can of Luminol and a blacklight. If they did, they'd never sleep on a hotel bed again. Hotel rooms are nothing short of a cornucopia of spooge and other assorted bodily fluids.

My asshole itched while I was reading this post!

It's not actually a "Quality Inn" if it says "Kwalittee" on a piece of cardboard above the entrance to a crackhouse.

NM: Thanks for that...as I sit here in just another of many spooge-atoriums.

Also "my asshole itched while I was reading this post!" may be the most heart-warming comment I've ever received. Seriously.

ACW: Spelling was never my strong suit.

One person's heart warming is another person's FART warming:)

PS: I believe it's Kwali-tay!

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